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Criticism Kills Relationship:True or False

James Okpu
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What's your response to the question. Does criticism kill a relationship.

Simply put criticism is the expression of disapproval to one's attitude, quality, actions either positive or negative. 

Criticism exist in healthy relationships and it is not wrong when it is done with a proper motive and not just to criticize your mate for everything.

Problem starts when Cristism becomes a habit, it open the doors of negativity and distructive relationship habits. This in time increases in frequency and pattern as well. 

Cristism automatically becomes your response mechanism and because your now use to it, you'd keep on bekering and tormenting the other over minor issues that can be overlook. This could keep mate apart feeling lonely. 

It also cloud your judgment or view on a matter. Instead of addressing a matter as it is, you'd always make your mate the topic of discussion. 


Criticism For What it is

If your married to someone you love or your soul mate per say, it doesn't cut off the existence of Cristism. 

Criticism is a non specific way of saying  something, attitude or reasoning is wrong. Is a generalize negative statements like "you know your always, if I talk now you go say, uno that how you are, why are you this..., I don't know why you are. 

This expression are usually generalize. Even if it is true or not it becomes tormenting and frustrating to the other. 

Instead, specificity is when you say. Why did you do this, I don't like what you did, how can we solve this. Could u adjust on this.  


Effect of Criticism 

It can create a war versus retreat level which increases stress level, hate and displeasure. Is like to countries in battle engaging and countering missile. 


According to Dr Gottman:

Expressing issues that create anger and disappointment, while not pleasant, improves a relationship more than suppressing it. - Dr Gottma

Say it as it is, is better than constant criticism or if you can overlook it. Pls do

Criticism reduces production level cause no one is ready to reason positively because a defence mechanism is on active mode ready to launch.

More on this... 

What do you think... 

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